Jayson Scott is nothing if not average. In fact, his social status is simply that: average. Average life in an average town west of Plano, Texas. Nothing special.
Jayson works nights at the 7/11 on Broad Street. Nothing out of the ordinary for the 22 year old college drop out. Most nights are slow but this night was especially boring. Three customers: the hot cheerleader from his high school Becky Taylor with her dumb ass boyfriend Jeremy Sox and some old man begging for smokes with only enough change for gum.
"Tell ya what," Jason remarks. "I'll give you a pack of smokes if you do me one favor."
"Yes?" the man asks.
"Come back after you find out who's playing at the Door and tell me, will ya?"
"Of course! Sure! Can I have Camel?"
I reach for the little brown box as he nods his head like a bobble figure. As he leaves in a dash I think to myself 'I was always taught to treat others the way I'd like to be treated. You know; Catholics. Lot of nothing but sitting and standing with strange chanting and something about bloody wine. Lot of whining going on in that church. Too much for me. I gave it all up years ago. Now the only thing I believe in is that flying spaghetti monster...that is if I ever catch the darn thing. As for God, I despised him. What a fucking hypocrite. Spouts a lot of shit about loving but when its his turn to love he just sends plagues.
An hour passes before the man comes back.
"I know who's playing!" he shouts as he slaps a flier on the counter.
"Nine Eleven to Panama, Calipso, Drugged by the Nails, and...what is this shit?!"
I raise an eyebrow to the man. He's written in a band on the flier: Jesus Loves You. My heart sinks a moment as it recalls my former religious zealous now snuffed by years of insecurity and uncertainty.
"Haven't you heard son? Jesus loves you...he loves all man. I wanted to thank you for being so kind to me. No one is ever so kind."
He begins to cry in front of me. I get very uncomfortable but am unable to tell him to shut up. He's gripping a cross so tightly his hands turn a ghostly white. He wipes his eyes, realizing I'm not a Christian, and drips them on my sleeve.
"I baptize you in the name of the..."
"What the fuck are you doing?! Get out of my store!"
I chase him out of the store and push him to the ground. I shiver with fear and anger at the man. I'd been baptized when I was four. I don't remember much more than icy water from a creek drowning me. My parents had to take me to the hospital. They claimed I rejected the healing power of Christ but how could I? I was four for Christ's sake.
As he once again dashes out of sight, I notice a glimmer on the ground. His crucifix broke off the chain and sits with chipped edges. It's made of electrical wire and two nails. I stare at it in my hands and a flashback hits me. I'm laying in bed drinking Jack Daniels with my boyfriend Daniel. We're smoking and discussing the occult when he turns to me in tears. I question what's wrong and he tells me he's devout. Has been for years and can't believe my feelings. I tell him I can't accept a God that would punish me with homosexuality. He punches me in the chest and runs out of the room. I call him later and he wont answer. I run into him one week later and he's wearing a cross for the first time since I knew him. It was a simple wooden plank colored with a rainbow. He agrees to talk to me. We sit in swings and discuss how religion isn't about separation but instead about unity, charity, and faith. I told him I'd run out of faith many years ago and I'd given up on myself.
"Give up on me. There's nothing you can say to make me change my mind. Until people accept us...until God accepts what he did to me...I'll never forgive him. I can't love him and I'm definitely not accepting him. I don't need people like that in my life."
Looking down at the nails I remind myself why I don't care for Christ. How can that man have such faith? How can he have such conviction to believe God loves him? God doesn't love anyone. If God loved me...he'd bring Daniel back. He'd accept gays and make the world that unified bullshit Daniel kept dreaming of.
I turn around and see a dog chained up outside the store. I'm not sure how I missed him before. A thick piece of rope tied around its neck it begins to screech at me with a low pitched bark. I cover my ears but the sound rings in my ears. I can't take it. I grab the nearest beer bottle and raise it above my head. I toss it with all my might, thinking about God and Daniel in a sickening whirlpool of hate. The bottle smashes the wall behind the dog. Shrapnel pierces the dogs skin and cuts into the rope. The dog shrieks one last time before turning tail down a nearby alley. Several red dots fleck the ground.
Walking back into the store I notice Daniel grabbing a candy cane. It was December. Outside it was snowing fiercely. If you stepped outside your vision would be as blind as my confusion. I drop the cross and Daniel looks my direction. Standing there I thought...'Did I just get a prayer answered?'
"Hello Jayson. Still as big a douche as ever?"
Daniel threw the candy cane on the counter as I stepped behind it in what seemed like a distant world.
"Did...did I just wish you here?"
"What the fuck Jayson? Are you high on the job? I knew you were a horrible person but this is a new low. Even for you."
I told him about the man who entered before him and about the poster still sitting on the counter. Daniel actually listened the entire time. Didn't say a word. He just kept looking at me like I was crazy until I finished. He grabbed his candy, took a bite and said, "You know what this means, right?"
I couldn't understand what he could have meant. I just shook my head like a moron. Confused and scared.
"You met Jesus...and threw him out of the store. You threw Jesus out of 7/11. Wow. Jayson, you truly are the scum of the earth."
Daniel was chuckling at me. I started laughing too. How absurd. Jesus...in our store? Then again...he did have long hair and was poor. As I contemplated all of this Daniel grabbed my hand and pulled me outside. It was snowing now. Where the man had fallen there was a snow angel. It was the strangest thing. Daniel kept laughing at these phenomenon.
"Told you dude. You fucking threw Jesus out of Heaven."
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